Post by #nolongervictimsadmin on Sept 17, 2013 11:46:20 GMT -8
I feel like it's best for me to write about both of my sexual assaults since both were by US Navy members.
In October of 2005 I was raped by a US Navy Engineer. I started hanging out with him as friends and nothing more. One night I was out with my friend Marissa and he called me saying their was a party at his house. Somewhat intoxicated I had Marissa drive me to his house. Marissa had to be up early the next day so she just dropped me off because I said he was willing to give me a ride home in the morning. I was ok with this because I've slept on his couch before. When I got to the house he opened up the door completely hammered drunk. There was no one else there not even his roommates. He told me he wanted to have sex with me & I told him no I didn't want to & on top of that I hadn't shaved. He threw his cup across the kitchen & became hostile. He said not shaving wasn't an excuse & he had a razor in the bathroom. He made me shave everything while he watched. He joined me in the shower & proceeded to have rough sex with me. He said it was getting to hot in the shower & made me go to his bedroom. He put a condom on & threw me on his bed. Watching me cry he kept having rough sex with me to the point the condom broke. (He texted me the next day telling me I needed to get plan B since the condom broke) Afterwards he made me lay in bed with him & drove me to my home in the morning with out saying a word. I ended up having pieces of the condom stuck up inside of me it caused me to have a 102 temp for 2 days.
After this assault I never told anyone. The only thing I was effected by was I couldn't listen to the Red Hot Chili Peppers because that's what was playing, I never went to parties alone, & I also had issues with having sex with my boyfriend whom I was dating at the time of this rape. I had no other major symptoms & was able to move on with my life & join the US Navy as an Engineer.
I joined the US Navy in May 2010. On October 2012 I was on deployment with the USS Gridley when we pulled into port in Bahrain. After being harassed by my chief & most of my department, they moved me to the EM shop. EM1 was always nice to me, saying he wanted to hang out with me in India, helped me with 2 of my qualifications, & told me I was a great sailor regardless of what everyone else said. I never hung out with him in India because he had a hotel room off from where we were told we could stay. He also didn't want to come back to the ship to sign out with me & wanted me to fake his signature so I could go out to where he was. Which I didn't want to get in trouble so I didn't go. However, in Bahrain he had a room on base that had a connecting common room & bathroom to GSM1's room. He told me he had duty on day that he had the room so I could use it to talk to my husband on skype & get away from everyone for the both days he had the room. The first day was good he wasn't there & I got to relax alone & speak to my husband. The 2nd day we had an Engineering BBQ. I was in the room waiting for the BBQ to start when he came in with both GSM1's. We left to the BBQ & had a good time. We went back to the room so I could talk to my husband some more. When I got done talking to my husband EM1, sitting on the bed, threw a pillow at me while I was sitting on the chair. I stood up & said that wasn't cool. He got off the bed & came up to me with a pillow & hit me. I told him to stop. He let go of the pillow & grabbed my arms & threw me on the bed & proceeded to get on top of me. I yelled for him to get off me as I screamed & fought him to get off me. I yelled for help as GSM1 came in the room & got his phone charger out of the desk & went back in the a jointed room with the other GSM1. I finally kicked EM1 off of me & said that it wasn't cool. The whole time he was holding me down I thought he was going to rape me. Giving him the benefit of the doubt that he was stupid & just playing around I decided to stay. I was flustered & said I needed a drink. I noticed when he poured my drink it was mostly vodka & a little bit of redbull so I drank it slow as we watched TV from different sides of the room. I stopped drinking when I felt a buzz but EM1 kept drinking. It got to the point he tried to give me a massage so I said I was going to leave & explore the base & go shopping just so I could get out of that situation. I ended up buying a belly dancer outfit that the guy claimed was one size fits all. I bought it but said I wanted to try it on back in the hotel. I went to the bathroom to try it on when I heard a knock on the bathroom door. It was EM1 as I opened the door enough where he could only see my face. He then barged in the bathroom intoxicated & started to grab me. I ended up pushing him out of the bathroom & locking the door to change back to my regular clothes. Once I changed I grabbed my stuff & snuck out of the hotel room & got on the next bus to go back to the ship.
After this assault I became more suicidal, since I was stuck with him as an LPO, requiring me to be helo'd of the ship a week later. I cannot trust military men or authority to protect me. I was in denial until they told me I had to fly out to the ship again. I filed a restricted report & then an unrestricted report when the ship pulled into port. I am terrified to be around men & especially higher ranking military men. I have anxiety while on base & off base. I've had panic attacks. I don't trust anyone. I don't want to leave my house & got a service dog to force me outside & provide protection. I still carry a knife with me. I am hypervigalent. I have some days of extreme depression where I don't want to get out of bed. I've had to see so many doctors & go to group therapy. I can no longer work on base because of too many triggers to the point I only come on base to muster & go to appointments.
Thank you for reading my story.
In October of 2005 I was raped by a US Navy Engineer. I started hanging out with him as friends and nothing more. One night I was out with my friend Marissa and he called me saying their was a party at his house. Somewhat intoxicated I had Marissa drive me to his house. Marissa had to be up early the next day so she just dropped me off because I said he was willing to give me a ride home in the morning. I was ok with this because I've slept on his couch before. When I got to the house he opened up the door completely hammered drunk. There was no one else there not even his roommates. He told me he wanted to have sex with me & I told him no I didn't want to & on top of that I hadn't shaved. He threw his cup across the kitchen & became hostile. He said not shaving wasn't an excuse & he had a razor in the bathroom. He made me shave everything while he watched. He joined me in the shower & proceeded to have rough sex with me. He said it was getting to hot in the shower & made me go to his bedroom. He put a condom on & threw me on his bed. Watching me cry he kept having rough sex with me to the point the condom broke. (He texted me the next day telling me I needed to get plan B since the condom broke) Afterwards he made me lay in bed with him & drove me to my home in the morning with out saying a word. I ended up having pieces of the condom stuck up inside of me it caused me to have a 102 temp for 2 days.
After this assault I never told anyone. The only thing I was effected by was I couldn't listen to the Red Hot Chili Peppers because that's what was playing, I never went to parties alone, & I also had issues with having sex with my boyfriend whom I was dating at the time of this rape. I had no other major symptoms & was able to move on with my life & join the US Navy as an Engineer.
I joined the US Navy in May 2010. On October 2012 I was on deployment with the USS Gridley when we pulled into port in Bahrain. After being harassed by my chief & most of my department, they moved me to the EM shop. EM1 was always nice to me, saying he wanted to hang out with me in India, helped me with 2 of my qualifications, & told me I was a great sailor regardless of what everyone else said. I never hung out with him in India because he had a hotel room off from where we were told we could stay. He also didn't want to come back to the ship to sign out with me & wanted me to fake his signature so I could go out to where he was. Which I didn't want to get in trouble so I didn't go. However, in Bahrain he had a room on base that had a connecting common room & bathroom to GSM1's room. He told me he had duty on day that he had the room so I could use it to talk to my husband on skype & get away from everyone for the both days he had the room. The first day was good he wasn't there & I got to relax alone & speak to my husband. The 2nd day we had an Engineering BBQ. I was in the room waiting for the BBQ to start when he came in with both GSM1's. We left to the BBQ & had a good time. We went back to the room so I could talk to my husband some more. When I got done talking to my husband EM1, sitting on the bed, threw a pillow at me while I was sitting on the chair. I stood up & said that wasn't cool. He got off the bed & came up to me with a pillow & hit me. I told him to stop. He let go of the pillow & grabbed my arms & threw me on the bed & proceeded to get on top of me. I yelled for him to get off me as I screamed & fought him to get off me. I yelled for help as GSM1 came in the room & got his phone charger out of the desk & went back in the a jointed room with the other GSM1. I finally kicked EM1 off of me & said that it wasn't cool. The whole time he was holding me down I thought he was going to rape me. Giving him the benefit of the doubt that he was stupid & just playing around I decided to stay. I was flustered & said I needed a drink. I noticed when he poured my drink it was mostly vodka & a little bit of redbull so I drank it slow as we watched TV from different sides of the room. I stopped drinking when I felt a buzz but EM1 kept drinking. It got to the point he tried to give me a massage so I said I was going to leave & explore the base & go shopping just so I could get out of that situation. I ended up buying a belly dancer outfit that the guy claimed was one size fits all. I bought it but said I wanted to try it on back in the hotel. I went to the bathroom to try it on when I heard a knock on the bathroom door. It was EM1 as I opened the door enough where he could only see my face. He then barged in the bathroom intoxicated & started to grab me. I ended up pushing him out of the bathroom & locking the door to change back to my regular clothes. Once I changed I grabbed my stuff & snuck out of the hotel room & got on the next bus to go back to the ship.
After this assault I became more suicidal, since I was stuck with him as an LPO, requiring me to be helo'd of the ship a week later. I cannot trust military men or authority to protect me. I was in denial until they told me I had to fly out to the ship again. I filed a restricted report & then an unrestricted report when the ship pulled into port. I am terrified to be around men & especially higher ranking military men. I have anxiety while on base & off base. I've had panic attacks. I don't trust anyone. I don't want to leave my house & got a service dog to force me outside & provide protection. I still carry a knife with me. I am hypervigalent. I have some days of extreme depression where I don't want to get out of bed. I've had to see so many doctors & go to group therapy. I can no longer work on base because of too many triggers to the point I only come on base to muster & go to appointments.
Thank you for reading my story.
